introverted_excavator: Oerba Yun Fang from Final Fantasy XIII (Default)
[personal profile] introverted_excavator
Hokay, currently having one of the most awkward AIM conversations ever.

So there's a guy I from Gaia that I've known for a while, I haven't exactly been talking to him at all lately, not because of any bad e-blood between us but more because I just haven't had the urge to talk to him.

Here's the thing, a few years ago he was the one person I confided in, when I was feeling like I had hit the lowest point in my life he was the person I leaned on for support. He was able to help me sift through my issues and sort them out and he never told a soul.

I knew back then that he had some feelings towards me, and I admit I harbored some of my own, it wasn't too rare for our IMs to go from playful to covert flirting. But that was as far as I was willing to take it.

We danced around the whole thing for a while, neither one of us admitting anything to the other, until a mutual (ex)friend of ours pretty much decided to make both of us fess up.

Yeah, that was the most awkward conversation I've ever had ever.

He said he had a crush on me, but he didn't know if he could actually be with me, and I told him that I couldn't be with him because I don't do online relationships (Nothing against them, just not my thing. I'm a tactile person, I need to be able to touch someone) and that was the end of it.

After that we just went back to normal sort of, our chats were still playful and goofy but without any of the flirting from before, which is sort of a relief but it's just different and awkward at the same time. Then a few months later he went off to college, started man-whoring his way through most of the female student body and had less time to chat.

I've come to accept that our friendship will never be what it used to be, it's just too awkward. And now I've come to dread anytime I go on AIM and see his name online in my buddylist.

Now here I am, trying to have a conversation with him after months of not hearing a word from him. God this is so stupid. Please excuse this babble imaginary readers.


introverted_excavator: Oerba Yun Fang from Final Fantasy XIII (Default)

May 2016

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